I don't claim to be a parenting expert. Noooo nooo, far from it. I know I am just starting out on my parenting journey and I have many obstacles yet ahead of me. However, I feel compelled to share with my readers the fact that there is a lie out there circulating in "new mommy land" and it goes something like this: "Oh it gets easier". Well from my experience thus far, and from what I have observed within my family and with the families of my friends, is that it does not in fact get easier, rather different. I mean, on what planet would parenting EVER get easier? Really.
I say this because as I ponder the life of my son ahead of him, and the challenges we will experience together, I cannot help but think that a mother gets no rest until (gasp) she dies. I have been tired for two years now. I look forward to the day I can actually get some sleep. The other night, I took a long bath, and intended to shave my legs but only did one, as I ended up falling asleep before I could do the other one. When I woke up and discovered what happened, I was much to tired to bother with the other leg and just went to bed.
However, this lack of rest a mother experiences goes much deeper. Oh yes, it starts with not getting any sleep due to the late night feedings, but I suspect it will carry on into alduthood as I am sure I will worry about his whereabouts late at night, is he driving safely, is he eating well, is he happy. I know my mother worried like that about me. I think it's natural. I believe the trick will be to control it and not let him see how much I am concerned.
I also want to address this issue of competitiveness among mothers in terms of having to have the most expensive things in which to showcase your baby. By that I am pointing the finger at those who believe it is mandatory to have an $800 stroller. Really, who needs that? When did having a baby become such a fashion show. I am a very practical person and came from very humble means. I just can't justify such expense in the name of showiness. I just don't buy into this business of having to have the latest and the greatest. I actually feel sorry for people who feel they have to keep up. What stress that must be.
Well those are my bits and pieces from my cupboards and drawers today. If you can contradict me on the lack of sleep bit, I would welcome that. Well I welcome any and all comments.
Till next time...
~M~
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Motherhood - Reader Discretion Advised: Contains sappiness
I thought today about blogging (okay ranting) about dishwashers (yes I could go on and on - I just don't get why some people don't group the cutlery together in the basket in the dishwasher. It takes like, oh a nano second to place a spoon in the basket beside another spoon and so on). And then I thought about regaling you with tales about cupcake decorating (which is tougher than I imagined. Those cupcake girls, or whoever they are, make it look easy). But no, I want to talk about Motherhood.
I still consider myself a "new" mom even though my boy is one year old. I guess because I still find myself marvelling at this little person who has come to join me in my life. I have vowed to cherish every moment, because as I am learning, it goes by quickly. I mean, had I known that the chest cuddles phase when they are newborn didn't last that long, I think I would have appreciated it more. And now that will never happen again. I will never have that tiny boy wrapped up in a blanket on my chest like that. But I do have the present. And I just drink up every moment.
My boy was crying not too long ago this evening and really just needed a cuddle. So I brought him into my darkened bedroom, sat down on my bed and just held him, with his back to my chest, stroking his hair. I was amazed at how quickly he fell back to sleep, and even though there are many things I had yet to do, I was not ready to give him up to his crib again. I just wanted to enjoy my time with him. Smelling his hair, hearing him breathe, feeling his warmth.
It's so easy to get caught up in what will happen tomorrow, or preparing for the future that we forget to just stop and really soak in the now. Really live the moment. You just never know when things might change in your world so I find myself just valuing what I have right now. Things are less than ideal in my world but I say "Things can always get worse". Not the positive thinking mantra most people live by, but it helps me to appreciate what I have now. And what I have now is a wonderful boy and loving family. And I intend to live day by day, and just soak up those beautiful moments that make up the greater picture of my life. I don't want to look back when my son is grown and think it was all a blur. No, I will have a collage of wonderful pictures in my heart and mind.
If you have read this far without gagging, I applaud you. And thank you.
Well those are my bits and pieces from my cupboards and drawers. Till next time...
~M~
I still consider myself a "new" mom even though my boy is one year old. I guess because I still find myself marvelling at this little person who has come to join me in my life. I have vowed to cherish every moment, because as I am learning, it goes by quickly. I mean, had I known that the chest cuddles phase when they are newborn didn't last that long, I think I would have appreciated it more. And now that will never happen again. I will never have that tiny boy wrapped up in a blanket on my chest like that. But I do have the present. And I just drink up every moment.
My boy was crying not too long ago this evening and really just needed a cuddle. So I brought him into my darkened bedroom, sat down on my bed and just held him, with his back to my chest, stroking his hair. I was amazed at how quickly he fell back to sleep, and even though there are many things I had yet to do, I was not ready to give him up to his crib again. I just wanted to enjoy my time with him. Smelling his hair, hearing him breathe, feeling his warmth.
It's so easy to get caught up in what will happen tomorrow, or preparing for the future that we forget to just stop and really soak in the now. Really live the moment. You just never know when things might change in your world so I find myself just valuing what I have right now. Things are less than ideal in my world but I say "Things can always get worse". Not the positive thinking mantra most people live by, but it helps me to appreciate what I have now. And what I have now is a wonderful boy and loving family. And I intend to live day by day, and just soak up those beautiful moments that make up the greater picture of my life. I don't want to look back when my son is grown and think it was all a blur. No, I will have a collage of wonderful pictures in my heart and mind.
If you have read this far without gagging, I applaud you. And thank you.
Well those are my bits and pieces from my cupboards and drawers. Till next time...
~M~
Friday, October 22, 2010
Phew! An Addendum to "Looking for My Brain. Have You Seen It?"
On my commute into work this morning, I was sitting near a group of women who were very animatedly discussing some of the absent-minded things they have done. I listened closely and giggled quietly to myself. I had to exercise some restraint not to jump in and say "I should tell you about the time I....".
It was a relief to know I am not the only person who seems to get myself into these sort of fixes. It has indeed been a source of laughter to me and my close friends. I'm glad they love me for who I am.
~M~
It was a relief to know I am not the only person who seems to get myself into these sort of fixes. It has indeed been a source of laughter to me and my close friends. I'm glad they love me for who I am.
~M~
Monday, October 11, 2010
Precious Moments
Every once in awhile, in our mundane lives, we are blessed with a special moment that just seems to stay with us forever. I have a feeling the particular moment about which I am writing, will be one of those moments.
Me and baby have been very unwell for several days now and today was especially bad as I felt particularly awful and to add to that feeling, guilty for not doing more with the wee one as I just did not have the energy.
However, when putting baby down tonight and giving him his last bottle of the day, I held him in my arms, gave him my usual kiss on the forehead and told him I love him. The little man is cuddled up in and holding on to his favorite blanket. This blanket is showing some serious wear and tear and it doesn't matter how much I wash it, the corners, which he sucks on continually, remain filthy looking and scraggly.
The bottle is approaching near empty and baby continues to play with the dirty corner of his blanket. Well I will be darned if he doesn't offer me the corner to suck on. He holds up this ratty, dirty corner of the blanket to my lips. Well what does a mother do? Of course, I took a small bit of the ratty corner in my mouth for just a moment and told him thank you. But what a sweet thing for him to do - offer mommy his favorite blanket to suck on, I mean in his world and in his mind, who wouldn't want to suck on it?
My boy is my treasure, that's for sure. There are so many special moments in motherhood but I just know that will be one I won't forget.
~M~
Me and baby have been very unwell for several days now and today was especially bad as I felt particularly awful and to add to that feeling, guilty for not doing more with the wee one as I just did not have the energy.
However, when putting baby down tonight and giving him his last bottle of the day, I held him in my arms, gave him my usual kiss on the forehead and told him I love him. The little man is cuddled up in and holding on to his favorite blanket. This blanket is showing some serious wear and tear and it doesn't matter how much I wash it, the corners, which he sucks on continually, remain filthy looking and scraggly.
The bottle is approaching near empty and baby continues to play with the dirty corner of his blanket. Well I will be darned if he doesn't offer me the corner to suck on. He holds up this ratty, dirty corner of the blanket to my lips. Well what does a mother do? Of course, I took a small bit of the ratty corner in my mouth for just a moment and told him thank you. But what a sweet thing for him to do - offer mommy his favorite blanket to suck on, I mean in his world and in his mind, who wouldn't want to suck on it?
My boy is my treasure, that's for sure. There are so many special moments in motherhood but I just know that will be one I won't forget.
~M~
Friday, October 8, 2010
Looking for my brain. Have you seen it?
They called it "pregnancy brain". Then after the baby was born, they called it "mommy brain". Lets just be honest and call it "missing brain". Okay. There it is. I mean...really. I am beginning to wonder if I should be allowed to go unsupervised. Tell me, please, my fellow moms, does the brain EVER return after having a baby?
Just to add insult to injury, and by that I mean all the food debacles I have had of late - and I digress, I should point out, this recent cooking experiment is brought on by some strange instinct that has kicked in and the guilt of not feeding my boy fresh foods. Anyways, back to the topic at hand. My lack of brain cells in connection with my cooking.
I have to go back to yesterday. I had hoped to cook chicken yesterday, took it out too late in the day to do anything with, so I left it to thaw, but forgot to put it in the fridge. So it sat out (actually in the microwave ??) all night and so I find this warm soggy chicken breast sitting there in the microwave this morning....oh my heart sank.
Tonight I attempted (with some measure of success, but not without challenges, and herein lies the story) to cook (new) chicken breasts. I like to broil meats. It's something, in addition to pasta, that I actually can do. But I have not done it for such a long time. And not with this particular oven. So I open the oven, reach in and adjust the rack high up. Then I set the oven to broil. Then when the oven was good and hot, I seasoned my chicken and placed it in the oven, and when I did, the pan slid slightly downward to the back. I gasped. Hot oven, chicken, and an unstable rack. This was not looking good.
Well it looked like the broiling pan had settled and was not going to go too far back so I left it. However when I returned to check on the chicken and turn it over, I opened the oven and started to pull out the rack ooooh so carefully. I managed to take the rack with the broiler still on it and put them safely on the oven door, removed the broiler pan to another location and grabbed the rack to reposition it. You can only imagine how difficult this was considering how hot the rack was and that I did not actually have oven mitts (where were they anyways??) but only tea towels at my disposal. So I take the rack and I reposition it and try and try and try to get it to settle in place. I thought I maybe had it upside down the first time so I turned it over the other way and it was not any better. I simply could not get this rack to settle. So I left it and hoped it would be okay like it was the last time.
WELL, if the darn pan didn't slide back even further this time. What? What? What did I do wrong???? Let me tell you I was holding my breath while it continued to cook and then when I returned to get it out, well, I was ooooh so careful. Had to remove the rack with the broiler pan teetering at the back of the oven. It was an extremely tense moment. You will be glad to know I did manage to safely remove both rack and pan.
But here's the punchline. The first time I put the rack in I thought it was upside down. So I flipped it. Turns out it was upside down AND in BACKWARDS. How did I miss that?
Good grief. These situations seem to be happening all the time. Not just with food. Lets talk about crumpling up the hood of my car, then lets talk about the 2 hours of my co-worker's time I took up because I misread her email and sent her on a wild goose chase. I think I lost a large number of brain cells. I swear, I wasn't always this dim. I'm sure of it.
Well regardless, at least I can laugh at myself. If any moms out there read this though, and can relate, please, by all means, leave me a message.
~M~
Just to add insult to injury, and by that I mean all the food debacles I have had of late - and I digress, I should point out, this recent cooking experiment is brought on by some strange instinct that has kicked in and the guilt of not feeding my boy fresh foods. Anyways, back to the topic at hand. My lack of brain cells in connection with my cooking.
I have to go back to yesterday. I had hoped to cook chicken yesterday, took it out too late in the day to do anything with, so I left it to thaw, but forgot to put it in the fridge. So it sat out (actually in the microwave ??) all night and so I find this warm soggy chicken breast sitting there in the microwave this morning....oh my heart sank.
Tonight I attempted (with some measure of success, but not without challenges, and herein lies the story) to cook (new) chicken breasts. I like to broil meats. It's something, in addition to pasta, that I actually can do. But I have not done it for such a long time. And not with this particular oven. So I open the oven, reach in and adjust the rack high up. Then I set the oven to broil. Then when the oven was good and hot, I seasoned my chicken and placed it in the oven, and when I did, the pan slid slightly downward to the back. I gasped. Hot oven, chicken, and an unstable rack. This was not looking good.
Well it looked like the broiling pan had settled and was not going to go too far back so I left it. However when I returned to check on the chicken and turn it over, I opened the oven and started to pull out the rack ooooh so carefully. I managed to take the rack with the broiler still on it and put them safely on the oven door, removed the broiler pan to another location and grabbed the rack to reposition it. You can only imagine how difficult this was considering how hot the rack was and that I did not actually have oven mitts (where were they anyways??) but only tea towels at my disposal. So I take the rack and I reposition it and try and try and try to get it to settle in place. I thought I maybe had it upside down the first time so I turned it over the other way and it was not any better. I simply could not get this rack to settle. So I left it and hoped it would be okay like it was the last time.
WELL, if the darn pan didn't slide back even further this time. What? What? What did I do wrong???? Let me tell you I was holding my breath while it continued to cook and then when I returned to get it out, well, I was ooooh so careful. Had to remove the rack with the broiler pan teetering at the back of the oven. It was an extremely tense moment. You will be glad to know I did manage to safely remove both rack and pan.
But here's the punchline. The first time I put the rack in I thought it was upside down. So I flipped it. Turns out it was upside down AND in BACKWARDS. How did I miss that?
Good grief. These situations seem to be happening all the time. Not just with food. Lets talk about crumpling up the hood of my car, then lets talk about the 2 hours of my co-worker's time I took up because I misread her email and sent her on a wild goose chase. I think I lost a large number of brain cells. I swear, I wasn't always this dim. I'm sure of it.
Well regardless, at least I can laugh at myself. If any moms out there read this though, and can relate, please, by all means, leave me a message.
~M~
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Oh Fudge!
A cook I am not! And tonight's debacle with the fudge is no exception.
For the last couple days I have been eyeing this Peanut Butter Candy recipe; I love, love, love peanut butter and when paired with the word "candy, well it sounded like a gift from heaven. And with only 4 ingredients, only 2 steps, what could go wrong? Well, plenty. I mean, even with the careful monitoring of the candy thermometer. Ah yes, that's where I went wrong. A recipe that required a candy thermometer, combined with the ever so smart idea of cooking this all up at 8:30 at night, when I stand the high risk of baby waking up just as the thermometer hits that critical point. It did in fact cross my mind, but I thought what the heck, he can cry for a minute or two if necessary while I deal with the candy.
Well that's exactly what did happen. Only his cry was a more urgent, "I've just had a bad dream and I really want my mommy" kind of cry, the kind that sends moms running quickly to see what's wrong. Now here I am, thermometer is indeed approaching that critical soft ball stage and what am I to do? I thought, Oh I bet I can just run quickly and grab him, put him in his playpen, then run back to the candy mixture on the stove. Well I did just that, and when I returned to the stove, well here it had exceeded the critical point. Well I proceeded with all the other steps and soon realized this was not going to be the yummy fudgy treat I had hoped for. Dry, crumbly, and had I not cut it out of the pan I placed it in, certain to resemble the fudge I created two years ago, which I think got buried in the backyard, still in the pan.
All this would not be so bad had I not messed up last night's hamburger (how can you go wrong, again?) and the popovers I had made (said it made 6 but I had so much left over that I filled the other muffin tins, only to realize afterward, I had only greased the first 6. Didn't matter, they all turned out like hockey pucks, only some came out easier than others).
Well I guess you don't learn from osmosis (is that the right word) by watching the Food Network. I had always kind of hoped that by watching it I had learned SOMETHING along the way. I mean I watch so much of it, how come I can't cook? Don't tell me practice because my budget can't afford that. Lets just stick with pasta for now...I can do pasta. And canned soup. Don't ask me to steam any vegetables though. Darn near burnt the steamer.
~M~
For the last couple days I have been eyeing this Peanut Butter Candy recipe; I love, love, love peanut butter and when paired with the word "candy, well it sounded like a gift from heaven. And with only 4 ingredients, only 2 steps, what could go wrong? Well, plenty. I mean, even with the careful monitoring of the candy thermometer. Ah yes, that's where I went wrong. A recipe that required a candy thermometer, combined with the ever so smart idea of cooking this all up at 8:30 at night, when I stand the high risk of baby waking up just as the thermometer hits that critical point. It did in fact cross my mind, but I thought what the heck, he can cry for a minute or two if necessary while I deal with the candy.
Well that's exactly what did happen. Only his cry was a more urgent, "I've just had a bad dream and I really want my mommy" kind of cry, the kind that sends moms running quickly to see what's wrong. Now here I am, thermometer is indeed approaching that critical soft ball stage and what am I to do? I thought, Oh I bet I can just run quickly and grab him, put him in his playpen, then run back to the candy mixture on the stove. Well I did just that, and when I returned to the stove, well here it had exceeded the critical point. Well I proceeded with all the other steps and soon realized this was not going to be the yummy fudgy treat I had hoped for. Dry, crumbly, and had I not cut it out of the pan I placed it in, certain to resemble the fudge I created two years ago, which I think got buried in the backyard, still in the pan.
All this would not be so bad had I not messed up last night's hamburger (how can you go wrong, again?) and the popovers I had made (said it made 6 but I had so much left over that I filled the other muffin tins, only to realize afterward, I had only greased the first 6. Didn't matter, they all turned out like hockey pucks, only some came out easier than others).
Well I guess you don't learn from osmosis (is that the right word) by watching the Food Network. I had always kind of hoped that by watching it I had learned SOMETHING along the way. I mean I watch so much of it, how come I can't cook? Don't tell me practice because my budget can't afford that. Lets just stick with pasta for now...I can do pasta. And canned soup. Don't ask me to steam any vegetables though. Darn near burnt the steamer.
~M~
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