This is Part II of, "You Can't Shave with Scissors", a post I have removed due to much reconsideration (funny only to me) That posting centered on a training session I had with "dreamy boy" and some unwanted armpit hair. Now I'm about to regale you with the tale of my next training session with dreamy boy.
I have typically been of the opinion that there is no need to be embarrassed in front of a trainer. They are professionals, not unlike a doctor in some regards in that they are accustomed to seeing bodies in all shapes and sizes.
My trainer had emailed me a copy of the routine we were going to go through together and at the top of the list was "jump rope". A brief twinge of concern fluttered through me, but I brushed it off, as I figured, "Oh well, he's likely seen it all. So what. I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing and no one can fault me for that, no matter what my shape. "
Well that thinking is noble, isn't it?
I get to the gym and was pleased that it was relatively quiet and not too busy that day. I ask for dreamy boy at the front desk and out we go to the gym floor. We find our spot in the corner, and get all our equipment together. Then he says for me to jump rope for one minute straight. So I start doing it (in front of a mirror no less, oh yeaaah), and two things happen here. 1) My belly starts flopping up and down. Oh, I tried not to let it get to me, and to hold to my noble thinking: "I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing. If I were skinny I wouldn't have to do this, so pooh on whoever is watching and snickering". Of course no one was but you know.. and 2) My britches were sliding off. Oh yes. I have managed to lose a bit of weight, just enough to make my workout pants slightly loose. They are fine for most activities, but something bouncy like jump rope or running, well they slide down pretty bad.
You can only imagine how embarassing this was. I mean, come on. Remember all the trouble I went through to remove armpit hair for this guy (unsuccessfully mind you). Now here I am in the middle of the gym, flab fluttering about, and my pants falling down. Sad thing is, I was doing really really well with the jump rope. It's not like I was tripping up a lot and could actually have a legitimate reason to stop. No. I had to stop in the middle of perfectly good jumping to pull up my pants.
What made it worse is we continued with our routine and when it came time to go through it a second time, he made a comment that we would just forget the jump rope until I get new pants. Oh nothing like rubbing it in. No, he couldn't have just passed it over and said nothing.
But that's not all. It's so weird with this guy. I have such a hard time watching him demonstrate the moves because you have to really examine his body and movement. Makes me uncomfortable. And then when he was having me do the walking lunges he would stand in front of me and walk backwards as I lunged towards him. Well he is fairly tall, and every time I would lunge forward, it would bring me face to face with ...yes, that. Oh talk about weird. I mean where am I supposed to look. So I just pretended to look right through him. Still made me uncomfortable. (Reminds me of my wall climbing experience, which I will have to share with you sometime.)
At the end of it all though, it was good. A good workout with a great trainer and he gave me another one of those half winks, showing off his adorable dimple.
Well those are my bits and pieces for now. A tad late, but there they are. Hope you got a giggle.
Till next time...
~M~
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